Thin Lizzy said it best: The boys are back in town. Well, just one boy. Me. And I'm pretty sure the "town" wasn't Charlottesville, VA. Actually, let me check on that. Hold on a sec.

Hmm... damn wireless connection... OK... the Internet seems to be saying some conflicting things, but none of them mention Charlottesville. In any event, it's good to be back, even though ironically all it's done is rain since then. It was so much sunnier in Seattle.

Marge and Monty were happy to be back-- I can tell Marge really missed being chased by a three-year old and a pug. And it's been good to see all of my friends again.

I'm starting 3-day preschool this year. I think the number of days a week that you attend school must be correlated with how old you are. This is why I never see daddy when his school's in session. More on school later, once I have more photographic evidence.

Now the most important stuff-- the wrap-up of the Eli Kaplowitz 50 state summer tour. Last time I checked in I was about to brave the wild north woods of Minnesota, where traditional laws regarding the operation of motorized equipment don't apply. Thus, I was able to steer a pontoon boat...

Captain an all-terrain vehicle...

And climb aboard a giant fiberglass fish...

All of that manly exertion deserved a stiff drink with my Uncle Mark. Apparently that's also legal in this strange land...

Cheers, clinky-clinky!

Lest you have any doubt that my geographical fascination has been a passing fad, let me just note that I followed our drive state by state, from Wisconsin (where I visited my guidemother, Lacey)...

Through Illinois, which I don't like because it has lots of traffic...
Through Indiana, which I don't like because it has scary storms...
Through Ohio, which I like because it doesn't storm there...
Through Pennsylvania, where I played shuffleboard at Char the Great's apartment building...

Through New Jersey, where I went to the top of this lighthouse...

Through Delaware, Maryland, Washington, DC, and back to... VIRGINIA! My favoritest place in the whole world. I'm so glad to be home, and I've reminded mommy and daddy of it about five times a day since we've been back, just to make sure they know.

The grand finale of the Parade of Family and Friends arrived last week when Grandma Lisa and Grandpa Paul came out to Seattle to visit:

I think they just wanted me for my salmon.

During the week, it was up to me (with a little help from mom) to entertain them, since dad was at the office the whole time:

Apparently he's trying to look important here. Whatever.

Last weekend, we all went to the Pacific Ocean, leaving Thursday afternoon and rolling into our lodge around 11pm. I was asleep, so this is all hearsay.

I awoke the next morning to some dramatic scenery, which put me in a bit of a dramatic mood. So I went to the beach to act out some of my favorite movies, including The Little Mermaid...

Cast Away... (I know it looks like "ELI," but I'm half way to "HELP")

The Ten Commandments...

...whereupon I led my family to the promised land of the tidal pools:

Follow me, fellow Jews... (Don't try to get technical on me just cuz I'm blond like my swedish mom)
The tidal pools were not as cool as I had hoped. I was pretty amped up after my swim lessons the week before, but the squishy tentacled things on the bottom of the pools deterred me from taking a dive:


I did meet one kid my age at the lodge where we stayed, but I'm not sure she was that into me. I thought she might want to hang out when I saw her approaching our table in the dining room, but then the conversation when like this:
Me: (running over to her, getting 4 inches from her face, and yelling at the top of my lungs) DO YOU WANT TO COME OVER TO MY TABLE?
Her: (petrified silence)
Me: No? (runs back over to family table) SHE DIDN'T WANT TO SIT AT MY TABLE.

So I have a ways to go in the smoothness department. For some reason, the Charlottesville women seemed to respond better to that line.

Speaking of Charlottesville, I have started the long journey back. Mom and I flew to Minnesota this past Monday (just before they started confiscating apple juice boxes at security-- I got mine in just under the wire!). We're hanging out here until dad comes by to pick us up and take us back home. In the meantime, I've been enjoying the company of Grandma Nene, Grandpa Don, Auntie Mare, and various other cousins. More importantly, mom bought me a house. I know-- a whole freakin' house. It's a small one, so I'll have to shrink a bit before I can live there full-time. But in the meantime, I'm renting it out to some miniature people and keeping them company. Mostly what I do is take all of the furniture in the house, load it into a toy car, and take the car on trips to different states to go hiking and camping. I don't know where I get these role-playing ideas... they just come to me out of nowhere, I guess. In a few days, I'll try to post some pictures of my house... either from mom and dad's camera, or from the realtor's web site.

Until then,
Eli